Answer: This question is asked periodically in my office. First, it's important for your wife to talk to her gynecologist. She might be able to determine if there are any physiological obstructions. She might also suggest that you fully arouse your spouse prior to penetration. Also, she might suggest that you use lubrication during lovemaking to make it easier and more pleasurable for your wife.

 

Not all pain during sex is physiological. I have counseled women who report that due to sexual abuse or rape, they actually experience pain during intercourse. If a gynecologist doesn't find any physical obstructions and your wife has experienced sexual trauma in her past, perhaps counseling would be the route to go for resolution. There are many female counselors who have had great success in this area of healing for women.

 

Don't give up! But be patient as you seek solutions together. Remember, being selfish and demanding will only frustrate you both in the end.